High Girl Thoughts: Jessica Assaf

Strain: Flow Kana Pineapple OG
Time: 11:12 pm
Location: Venice, California

I feel like I've been rushing my entire life, aimlessly running from one goal to the next. Maybe that's why I am always lost in the geographical sense. On paper I seem forever together, full of ideas and purpose since I was fifteen years old. I realized something huge on Friday night at the Love Dome in Venice at a 2-hour healing meditation that Lauren Unger insisted I attend for the promise of higher consciousness. I realized that this constant rush, this overwhelming sense of urgency that has haunted me since high school, was entirely self-imposed. If I'm totally honest with myself I know that it all stemmed from the false idea that I had to earn my Dad's love through academic and personal achievements. I funneled so much energy into attempting to make him proud that I lost sight of my true identity and purpose. After graduating from business school and checking the last accomplishment box, I finally felt ready to give myself the space to listen to my voice. Here I am, with no income, savings account, or guarantees, and only the conviction that we will change the fate of this plant in our lifetime. For the first time in my life, I feel like I'm at the right place at the right time, doing exactly what I should be doing.